Hey there y'all! Its been so insane! I finally had my last required interview for my internship this summer. It was good for the most part... Regardless of all the stuff I head to do with that, I had to jump also onto school work and reading and homework... oh my! Absolute insanity... however, with the internship stuff all behind me now, I can focus solely on this semester and this final year of school as well! When it comes to me and God... I'm actually in a pretty cool place but at first I didn't really like it all that much. My professor in my senior level spiritual formations class, Dr. Howard, used the analogy of going whitewater rafting and I'm currently at a pool of rest. I am recovering from the rapids of transformation that I went through with being in an internship and letting God use me the ways he needed me to. He is wanting me to rest and recover while learning more about him and about myself during this time. I have felt and can tell that there are some pretty intense rapids to come for me soon so I must be prepared for it. At first, I wasn't too happy because I'm so future, task focused that being told to just rest, relax, and live in the moment you are in now was not at ALL what I wanted to hear. But as time went on, I realized I really did need it. There was a lot I had gone through and how I felt like some serious, life changing was "coming down the pike" (as my professor would say - he's a yank! ;) ), I needed this to understand God more, understand myself more, and really prepare for what was to come. I'm going through everything from God and who he is, to who I am, to my issues of trust, fear of the future, endurance, patience... everything! It really seems like God is going over me with a fine tooth comb and really taking inventory and helping fix some things. During this time I've been meeting with my mentor constantly, continuing to learn and dig deeper in my studies about God and myself in many ways, and I've received a lot of guidance and advise from many people all the way from professors to friends. Its quite something to be learning about myself and God in such deeper and profound ways than I never really thought and looked at before. I'm so excited to see what is to come! :) Now onto one of my favorite parts of the blog! This past weekend my boyfriend, Rich and I, we decided to do something different for a Saturday night outing. So we got all dolled up (Doesn't he look absolutely delicious?! He's so hot! Tehehe...:D ), and we headed some place new - The Original J.Peters Steakhouse and Restaurant in historic downtown Anderson, SC. Now we didn't know what to expect except what our friends told us about the place. We walked in and I would probably think of a place much classier than Taco Mac/Chili's that was built in one of the original buildings built there in Anderson. It has had some adding on to but with as amazing and "hopping" of a place it was, I can see why! It had a long bar with a few flat screens propped up to show the football games that were on but Rich and I decided to sit in one of the nicer, family areas of the restaurant. Our server was a sweet young lady who was very hospitable and very knowledgeable of the selections there and all the great food! And was the food great... more like amazing! The price is about average, maybe a bit on the high side but otherwise, reasonable! It was something close to a five star restaurant quality of food. Rich had the Hickory Smoked Salmon and I had the House Sirloin with loaded mash potatoes. I really don't know how else to describe it except incredible! I had not enjoyed such great food in a long time! Salmon was perfect and flaky, the steak cooked to perfection... so good! They have just about anything and everything you can think of: from fried chicken, to filet minion, to burgers, to sandwiches, to seafood, and even some incredible desserts from what I have heard about (hadn't tried any of them sadly - wish too though next time), and probably the best sweet tea I've had in a long, long time! Seriously though, if that is how they are all the time, I can see why people love going to it so much! The atmosphere is a bit loud at times not because of it being a bar with games on, but more than likely the acoustics because of the building being so wide and having such high ceilings. So really in the end: Guys if you ever get a chance to go to one of the few places where J. Peters is set up in and around Anderson, go to it! Its phenomenal and you won't regret it! Well that's it for me for now! I'll talk to you guys hopefully soon! Take care and later dayz! ~Jeanne :)

Well it has been a while again! Sorry about that! But just to catch you up on things: my internship went great, finished it up, and have been debriefing about it ever since with alot of people. Definitely helped me learn some things about myself as well as ministry but it really did solidify some things in me but more on that later! Now... Its official: I'm in my last year of college! The beginning of the end, the finish line, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow... I can't wait to finish! It's been such a long journey and I have to admit quite an incredible one too! This semester I'm taking nothing but Senior level courses, all required, and more hours than I've ever taken yet (yeah, yeah testing my "thresh hold" as some might say). And yes it has been a bit overwhelming; however, it has been good! I've learned alot out of these classes already so I'm actually quite excited for what's to come! :) Lately, God has been dropping some phrases here and there for me to listen to and learn about. Such words like "endurance", "Seek Me", "Know Who I Am", and "Living In The Moment" have all been said to me in some fashion or form in the past couple of weeks. As I beginning digging deeper with him, I hope and pray that I truly begin a spiritual journey like never before with him: getting to know him, learning to live in the moment and enjoy it, and in the end addressing some insecurities of my own. Now for the fun part! As you guys remember me telling you some posts back that I wanted to start doing my own little fun food blog about checking out local restaurants in the area and telling you about them and how awesome their food is. Well... It's Toccoa's turn now! As my last year of school, I want to help the local restaurants and eateries of Toccoa and the surrounding areas by checking them out, seeing how they've been significant to their area, and of course how awesome the food is! So here we go y'all its a double doozie with Toccoa's local landmark and favorite, Bell's Hamburgers and GA Fried Chicken, and Lavonia's favorite little hidden Bar-B-Que treasure, Gumlog's Bar-B-Que & Fish Lodge! Bell's has been a classic staple of the Toccoa community for at least 50 years. With a country rustic feel inside, extremely hospitable staff, and some awesome Southern cooking, this is one place you can't miss when you visit up here at the Appalachian Foothills. Now I've been here twice and I've loved both times! With everything from steaks to hamburgers, fried chicken to fish, french fries to Cesar salads, and milkshakes to cobblers this place has it all! My first time there was with my roommate Chelsea, I had their Chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes and cole slaw and it just about put me over the moon! My second time there I was with my dad, little brother and sister, and my boyfriend and it was pretty good! I had the basic chicken tender basket, fries, and some steam veggies (hey now, a girl's got to keep her figure). I really liked the breading they use for the fried chicken: very simple with a bit of spice to it! I promise you - There is no one that isn't going to find any thing on the menu they won't love! My dad absolutely devoured the fried chicken (as did my little brother and sister)and my boyfriend really enjoyed their bar-b-que! So again, you'll find at least one thing you're gonna love here! Be sure to check them out soon! :) Now on to Gumlog! I first found out about Gumlog completely unintentionally. Last Sunday I went to church with some of my best friends, Megan and Nate (and soon to be Zoe) Brown! Since it was the first time there for me at their church, I was told to fill out a welcome card and turn it in at the back of the church and I would get a little gift to thank me for my visit there. Well I did so and I expected like a candy bar or a water bottle but instead I got a 50% off coupon for Gumlog's Bar-B-Que & Fish Lodge! I had never heard of the place and so the Browns were kind enough to take me and share this lovely little unknown treasure of Lavonia. Literally the place is on back roads and it seems to be set up either in an old barn, work shed, or moonshinery place. Either way, we get there and it completely jam packed full of people! That's when you know, people, you've found something good... Started in 1974 by an old moonshiner (as it says on its menu), Gumlog's has provided some of the best country home cooking you would have never known existed. Anything and everything you can think of with fried chicken, Bar-B-Que pork and beef, catfish and other marine delicacies, and all with a pitcher full of sweet tea left at your table during your visit for you to fill up your glass and enjoy! The atmosphere is warm, friendly, cabin country style with red and white checker cloth tables, wooden booths and tables, and deer's heads handing from the walls. It can also be easily seen that this place has had to expand due to its popularity with at least 2 or 3 big sections of the restaurant not matching the original design and structure of the building. Regardless, you're gonna love what they got to serve there so be sure to check it out!! :) Also, if you know of some great places here and around the Toccoa area (including but not limited to Lavonia, Hartwell, Commerce, Cornelia, Clarksville, Royston, Elberton, or even Westminister, Seneca, or Anderson, SC) let me know and I'll try getting out there to see them! Well that's it for me! I'll see y'all around! Later days! :)

Hey y'all! Finally have a brief moment to catch you up on some stuff that has been happening! First of all, my internship is crazy busy but crazy fun! I'm enjoying myself while at the same time I'm stressing some about making sure I finish stuff and fulfill my requirements for school. Slowly but surely I'm doing it but I've still got a few more vital stuff to do before I'm done officially here. I mean I've done alot already! Revamping communications, providing a summer program for the kids on Wednesday nights, mentoring a child (sorry I haven't told you guys much about them, kinda confidential), planning, organization and completing a VBS program for them, going to meetings, meeting families and their kids, leading a small group, planning and leading the devotional time of a family retreat... and more! So I'm grateful of what I have accomplished and experienced so far in this internship! Another thing I realized this week... I'm 3 weeks from being finished with my internship! This internship has truly flown by, its been so much fun, and I've enjoyed it so much! In about 4 weeks I'll be starting my final year of school!! :D I can't wait!! There is so much about to happen to me... I can just feel it! Alot of things are about to come to completion for me! I can't wait to see what happens because of it! Okay so since its been a while since I've told you of a couple of places, I should catch you up! One of the places I'd like to tell you about is a restaurant called the Cook Out! Now this place is kinda of all over the place on the east coast but it was the first time I had heard of it. So I checked it out with some people from my church one Sunday afternoon after church! It is really, really good! This restaurant, located on the main strip of Anderson (Clemson Blvd), makes all their food fresh, from scratch, and is priced a pretty decent price (You can get a Cook Out Special in which you choose a main entree, two sides, and a large drink for like 4.39). Now I have had their chicken tenders there which aren't terrible but they ain't nothing to wrote home to mom about. The burgers are really, really good and really fresh! Another specialty they have - 38 different milkshake flavors which are pretty awesome too! Their atmosphere is very much a fun, family/hang out with friends place with mostly wooden booths to sit at and music playing consistently. (did I mention its a Christian owned place? Just want to make sure). The place and people are very friendly and hospitable. So if you're ever in Anderson and want some really good food at a really great price, check out the Cook Out! :) Now another place I enjoyed was actually outside of Anderson in a little town called Hartwell, Ga! That's where my wonderful boyfriend lives and one weekend I got the chance to stay there to help out with an event his church was doing. While there I got to eat at this place not once but twice and I must say it was really, really good! Its called the Downtown Cafe of Hartwell. They specialize in a lot of good dishes, some American, some Greek, and some Italian and all of which I've tried and I've enjoyed very much so! I had their Philly Cheese steak Sandwich one day while another day I have their Cantonella which was so cheesy, meaty, and so good! Their atmosphere is very much a mix of the three cultures with a bar and TVs showing the latest sports games. The place is kinda dark with low lit lights so it can have a bit of a romantic feeling if you are closer to the back of the restaurant. The people are very kind and very friendly. So if you are ever in Hartwell, be sure to check it out! Well that's it for me now! I'll be back later and tell you more of what is to come with me and my internship and what other great places I find in this area! Later dayz! ~Jeanne ;)

Hey y'all! Hope all has been going well for you... Well as you can see I've got such a nice office and trust me, all this past week that was the only scenery I had. Don't get me wrong; I love my internship but its kinda hard to sit at a desk for such long extended periods of time in order to create and write curriculum and design family ministry programs. I guess it just something I have to get use to, I guess. However come next week, I'll have a week off from my internship to rest and relax! So excited for that; To Do List: Sleep in, Do a little more exploring around Anderson, Spend some time with my man, spending time with my host family, Maybe get some reading done and school assignments for my internship. Yeah, it'll be good... :) Speaking of family ministry programs, I officially started a couple of them this week! One of which is called "Summer Sizzle", our Wednesday night children's program for the children's ministry. We are using some of the material from Lifeway's "Amazing Wonders Aviation" and are having a blast with it! This isn't just something to keep kids entertained while mom and dad go to Wednesday night service or small group; we play game, sing, dance, and learn about God's incredible power in all aspects of life! Also during this time I've been putting together and putting the word out about the small group I'm starting at the church the first week of July - for engaged and married couples! I'm so excited about it and can't wait to start it next week! We are going to go in-depth and look at what God's original design is for marriage and how to keep God in the center of one's relationship while hitting on topics like holistic intimacy, communication, conflict, headship and submission, learning to love and respect one another, and so much more! Its been cool to prepare for it and to break it down to help make it more prominent to couples. I just can't wait to start it and see how God will take this passion of mine and what he's placed on my heart and see what he'll do with them! Now to tell of my newest food find here in Anderson! If you go down to the historic downtown area of Anderson, you'll probably see some quaint businesses and restaurants. Now when I got there, I was told by many people that I met there to try one of four places: Summa Joes (I went on Monday and apparently its not open on Mondays), Sullivan's (I couldn't find it until I was leaving), Peter's (really nice and expensive from what I heard) or Trio (which is where I ended up). Now I didn't know what to expect since there were no doors or anything to indicate its entrance; it was just a huge gaping hole in between some storefronts! But when I walked in, it felt very cool and comforting! Decked out in some really modernized, Italian influenced decor I was excited to try it out! Now when I sat down, my waitress told me that the Lobster Bisque was their specialty there (and I believe her very much so); however, I tried a modernized take on the philly cheese steak sandwich - it was a philly cheese steak wrap but it was cooked a little bit differently! They had all the regular fixings on it (onions, peppers, and mushrooms) but they cooked it with some black pepper and spices that just put it over the top! It was so gooey and spicy all at once! Makes my mouth water thinking about it again! You get a choice of a side item like salad, soup, or fries (and you know I can't turn down fries) and a drink! One of the other things about this place is their house bread - hot fresh bread with olive oil and fresh Parmesan cheese dowsed on top! It was so simple and so amazing! And with all this great food, it only cost me about $10! I really can't wait to go back there again; the people there are so friendly, the atmosphere warm, and the food so good you'll find any excuse to stay just a bit longer. Well that's it for me this week! Check back next week to hear about my internship adventures and my food discoveries! Until next time, take care and later dayz! ~Jeanne ;)

Hey there y'all! So... I just finished up week 2 of my internship where I got to help facilitate Chick-Fil-A's week-long Winshape Camp at our church for 1st graders to 6th graders. Y'all I have to say I have never been so exhausted and yet so extremely overjoyed and in love by an incredible event like this before! We had over a 175 kids show up to the camp during the week where they learned how to not just be ordinary people, but extraordinary people for God! The kids learned about repentance, courage, surrender, missions, and worship while they participated in awesome activities like cooking, archery, flag football, digital photography, gymnastics, dance, drama, and ever so much more! We had the amazing green team from Winshape Camps, consisting of 23 gifted and incredibly altruistic 20 somethings, come in and lead 30 volunteers from our church. So many lives, children and adult alike, were impacted in some way, shape, or form. By the end of the week, we had 15 kids accept Christ as their Lord and Savior! Praise the Lord!! I can't tell how incredible of an experience this was and how much I can't wait to use this event myself once I become a Children's minister! If you want to learn more about it check out their website http://winshapecamps.org. In other news, I got introduced to another one of the local restaurants here in Anderson: Arnold's Famous Homemade Burgers! This one and only restaurant has been a part of the Anderson community since 1981 and has been one of the main staples of Anderson ever since! The restaurant is set in a 50s/60s diner with the black and white tile floors, bright silver lunch counters and chairs, and tons of photos from that era forward; definitely a very easy going, friendly, and enjoyable place and atmosphere. But its their food that really gets the customers coming back! Ranging from their famous homemade burgers to chicken fingers to salads to just about anything, Arnold's really has some of the freshest, best tasting food around. I was joined on my first visit there with my host family as we sat to enjoy our some time together (which is rare) and some awesome burgers and hot dogs. I had a great bacon cheeseburger; the patty's texture may remind you of a Wendy's burger but I guarantee you its so much more fresher than Wendy's is! So whenever you're in the area and are craving a good burger, check out Arnold's! To contact them or get directions, check out their website at http://www.arnoldshamburgers.com. Well that's it for me! Hope all is going well for you and hope to hear from you soon! Later dayz! ~Jeanne ;)

Hey there y'all!! Sorry for the very, VERY long time off from the blog but now I'm back! And... I've got a couple things happening that I just had to share with y'all!! One of the first things that I want to let y'all know about is that ever since Thanksgiving last year, I've been looking for an internship for me to do as a requirement for my degree in Family and Children's Ministry. About a month before summer began, I locked down and confirmed an internship! Right now, I am literally typing this from my host home in Anderson, SC where I am living for the summer while I fulfill my summer internship at Covenant Baptist Church. I work under some of the best pastors ever and the kids are so much fun! I'm enjoying it so, so, SO very much! Right now I'm in my 2nd week of internship as the church is hosting Chick-Fil-A's Winshape Camp and we have between 150-200 kids this week! So excited and so much fun! When it comes to the rest of the internship, I have so much more to do and so much more to plan and to execute but I really can't wait! Now another thing I've been wanting to announce for quite sometime! I've been wanting to get to see and get to know the cities that I've been living in while also helping to invest back into the community! So what better way to do that than to not only check out the local restaurants but to also promote them and advertise for them! So you could say I've become somewhat of a local food critic and advertiser... ;) Now while I'm here in Anderson, SC I'll be sure to let you know what I find and how it goes! And since I'm already here... ;) Let me tell you about one of the most popular hot spots for eating and enjoying one of America's favorite classics: Hot Dogs! Check out Skin's! Skin's Hot Dogs has gotten such a awesome response and following that it even made it on to Food Network's popular TV show "Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives" with Guy Fieri! Having been around for about 66 years, its become a real staple in the community here in Anderson! As it tells us on their website: "Skins was established in Anderson, SC in 1946 by Loyd “Skin” Thrasher. In a humble, “pool hall” type atmosphere Skin sold anything he could, including short-order meals such as sandwiches, hamburgers, & the same hotdogs we enjoy today. As time passed, the hotdogs became the item of choice for Skin’s patrons. To meet the local milltown folks’ demand for a quick & quality meal, Skin decided to get rid of the pool tables & concentrate on hotdogs. Today the legend lives on just the same."~skinshotdogs.com Seriously, when I first got here and started asking around, this was one of a few names that kept popping up! Now I will say that unfortunately I didn't get to try this at one of their four restaurants but it was an awesome experience none the less! Classically cooked with a great blend of pork and beef meats, either naked or covered with their chili, its a great place to come to enjoy good food at good quality! Well that's it for now! I'm gonna chill out for a while before heading to bed and finishing the rest of this week with Winshape camp! I'll let y'all know how it goes as well as some more killer restaurants in the areas! Later dayz! ~Jeanne ;)

Hey guys! Hope all is going well for ya! Just needed to vent a bit and really in all honesty just ask you guys to be in prayer for me right now...

Well first of all, Summer... during this time it should be restful and relaxing time for me (since I'm not taking any classes) but unfortunately its not. I'm one of those people for some reason that, when left in seclusion long enough, I begin to start thinking about the future and start worrying about it. I know I shouldn't and I wish I could just stop worrying but that's the problem: I've never learned how to make myself do that. Trust me I wish I could but for whatever reason... I can't. Trying to take my mind off of it for time does help some but I know I can't do that forever; plus, it always comes back and hits me like a tsunami wave. Why? I don't know... issues with trusting God, uncertainty of the future, second guessing the choices I've made in life thus far, etc. Trust me though, there are some things I know for certain that I don't regret or second guess myself for doing: my missions trip to Mexico, starting school, dating my best friend whom I love, respect and adore, all the friends I've made here at TFC and at ACC (or Point University as they call themselves now). There is so much stuff (and people) I would have missed out on if I hadn't done what I have done. I just wish for peace right now in my troubled mind...



Of course because of this, my first and overwhelming reaction is to run for it! Run away and move on to something else and just start wondering on through life again. For whatever reason, I still have this reaction after all this time of me trying to trust in God and move in the direction that it seems God wants me to go in. But I know that the things I truly want and desire in life I'm never gonna get if I keep having that mentality and behavior in me. However the longer I stay put, the more worries, the more fear, the more uncertainty builds in me... WHY?! WHY CAN'T I JUST BE NORMAL?!?! Even through all this I seek God and try to better understand why I'm like this, searching my own heart and soul and trying to understand why I'm like this. Is it because of distrust having a hold of my heart for so long? Is it because of the constant moving about all my life and just learning to be emotionally detached for so long? Never having friends, never allowing myself to be known, never seeking and pursuing to love someone more than myself? Or a combination of a couple of these or all of them? I just don't know...
I do however know this: my God loves me, he has put people in my life who love me too and that no matter how much I worry whatever it may be I always make it through. Yes, it has always cost me something but isn't that the point of being a Christian? Yes we have the freedom and right to choose (so really I do have the freedom to run if I wanted to) but I know that if I do I would be turning my back on God, his will for me and those that I love most in life. I'm scared... I'm uncertain... I'm doubtful... but I choose to still try and walk on (even though at times it feels like I'm crawling on my hands and knees just to move forward). Why? Because in the end - no matter how eloquently I put it - it's seems to be the right thing to do and I know what I do the right thing that pleases God, my heavenly Father.
Also during this time, I finished Emerson Eggerichs' book "Love and Respect" and this quote that I read has pretty much haunted me for the past couple of days: "James 4:2 [You do not have because you do not ask] does not refer to asking God for health and wealth. It is talking about asking for power to cope with life's real problems. If anything is heard in heaven, it is the unselfish prayer, based on the heart of God. Too many people pray, 'God, here is what is on my heart. Please fulfill my desires for me.' What we should be praying is, 'God, here is what is on your heart. Please fulfill your desires in me.'" I guess right now I'm trying to figure that out too...

Well that's it for now! I'm heading home to see my family for the first time in a while! Gonna try and enjoy the rest of this summer as much as I can and not think too much about the future... hope to hear/see some of y'all soon! Later days!

~Jeanne :)

Hey guys! Sorry again for it being a while since I last posted but its been quite an interesting kind of month and definitely one that has taken quite a toll on me...

First of all, Rich and I celebrated our 6 month anniversary! It was so awesome... he took me out to eat and then surprised me by taking me to a drive in movie place for the very first time! It was so cool... we saw X-Men: First Class and since the movie was set in the 60s and all, it worked so well with the drive in theater. We had a blast!
After that week, things kinda started going downhill for me for a bit. For a few different reasons, that old part of me that is so use to moving around and not having a place to call home start rising up in me again and was becoming kinda restless and wanting to get out of this place. I don't know where it came from but it was definitely something I knew that I needed to handle and understand quickly. After talking to a few people and really trying to see what was going on, I think I understand what it was now: being so use to not staying in a place for so long, the habit of packing and moving was starting to get at me. I'm one of those people that in order for me to feel like I'm accomplishing something in life I need some kind of tangible evidence; for whatever reason, I think I translated moving from place to place as evidence me moving on and through life. But that's a problem... because that is not what I want in life. I truly want a place to call home and settle in a place for a time and grow deeper into the community. So now apparently there is this desire to find where I belong - my home - and the habit of always being on the move and not calling any place mine. There may be some of you out there that actually understand what I'm going through; no worries though... this heart's desire I'm starting to slowly see and realize is far stronger than the habit of always being on the move.



Well for some of you, y'all knew I got sick but for those of you who don't, I got terribly sick about a week and a half ago with a nasty sinus infection that had begin to turn into pneumonia. Not only was this very rare but completely inconvenient (well at least I think it was) because the next session for summer school was starting and I was wanting to attend to at least get a couple of classes out of the way. Not only was I pretty much bed ridden for the next week or so but I also was unable to attend any classes; so I withdrew from the summer session. I can not tell you how absolutely irritated I was by all this! First of all, I very rarely get sick (like it happens once or twice a year and generally I get over it in a couple of days - yeah I have one of those insanely strong immune systems) but for it to happen at just that time and for it to last that long made it impossible to get out of bed, let alone attend any kind of class. However in a matter of one day, I had 4 different people tell me the exact same thing (what makes it even more interesting is that 3 of these 4 people I don't even really know): "It seems for right now you just need to rest and take a break from school for a while..." Okay, I'm not one of those people that can NATURALLY take it easy; I mean even now I'm reading books and articles on marriage (like Dr. Emerson Eggrich's Love and Respect book - amazing book by the way), God's design for it (awesome articles on Focus on the Family's website on this topic)and its importance in the structure of family and community not because I'm bored but because this is what I'm studying in school to get a degree in. I have to do something! If I don't, I feel like a slob or something. However, I've begun to realize that resting is a good thing and is even something that God expects us to do (like "taking" a Sabbath I guess). For me, I'm just not use to resting. Slowly but surely God is showing me that resting and waiting is a good thing and that during this time I can use it to better myself in my walk with him and to do some reading and studying at my own leisurely pace in things that I've always wanted to dig deeper into.
In all honesty though, I really can't wait till I'm done with school... this stress and pressure crap is for the birds. Unfortunately though I still have two years left... *>.<*

Any ways, that's it for now! Hope all is going well for y'all and hope to see ya soon! Happy early 4th of July and later days!

~Jeanne :)

Hey guys! I know, I know... its been a while and I'm sorry about that but you know, alot of things have been happening and even though it seemed really bad has started turning out to be something beautiful...

Well this summer was intended for me to be somewhat of a "catch up" summer for me with school but alot of things happened with me at once and because of that it really knocked me for a loop and I realized really quickly that I needed to take a break for a while from school. For the past 4 years I've been going HARD CORE beginning with my almost year long mission trip to Mexico and then immediately heading into school afterwards where I've been spending the last 3 years of my life and it wasn't until in the past couple of weeks I've realized I haven't had a real breather in a while. So for the past couple of weeks and even for the next couple of weeks I'm taking it off and relaxing some and pursuing hard after God in ways I haven't really had a chance to do in a while.



Now when it comes to these struggles... well lets just say they have alot to do with my concepts and preconceived notions of marriage and families. For me right now I've had to go through the ringer about that. I still don't have all the answers (in fact I feel like I have no answers still) but I'm trying to understand alot of things when it comes to marriage and families. Of course I know that no family is perfect but if you've based alot of your ideals and notions about marriage and family on your own family because really that's the only example and tangible evidence of these ideals and notions in your life then its going to harder than anything in and of this world to try and start understanding any other form or concept of family. For me, my family is all I've ever had in my life; the only true stable thing over the years for me as I moved from place to place, changing in and out of schools and churches, always feeling and being treated by others that I don't belong, even coming in and out of heart broken relationships. My parents and my sister have always been there for me and it is almost unbearable whenever I see them going through struggles and I'm not capable of helping them - literally and figuratively. I feel like in some sense I owe them at least that for always being there for me when no one else was. However, because I relied so much on my family and looked to them for answers I forgot about the other being that has been in my life: my perfect Heavenly Father. Instead of looking to him for the right answers that my family couldn't give to me, there was ALOT of ideas that have developed over the years that either weren't true or falsely assumed by me. In the end, it is my fault that I've allowed myself to think and believe in the manner that I do about families and marriage and now I must throw out EVERYTHING that I thought I knew about family and begin this process all over again (and for those of you who know me, I hate these kinds of processes). I know that its time for me to move on, grow up and become the responsible adult that my parents worked so hard to raise me to be all these years; its time for me to let go and let God change me into the person he needs me to become to fulfill his will on this earth not only as I become a Family and Children's Minister but as I later on become a wife and a mother my self. Please pray for me right now as I begin this and ask that God would open my mind and heart and teach me in ways like he never has done before when it comes to what and how he truly designed families and marriage to be like.



Recently the most overpowering and consistent thing that I keep hearing and seeing in my quiet time and personal life is the promises of God and me being an heir of God. I can't help but see how this really will play into what I'm trying to learn about families and marriage but also one of the overall things I've been trying to deal with and be better at - trusting God. I know that with everything that has gone on in my life and all the people I've met and known, its hard to believe in promises and trust in people. One of the things that my dad taught me was, "Your word means everything. Your character, your integrity, your identity is based on the words you keep or break." For far too long, I've focused on how people will keep breaking this promises to me, waiting for them to pull that rug out from under me and unfortunately because of that its transferred over into my spiritual life and walk with God, hindering me from truly trusting in him. I feel like I've got to ask God for forgiveness everyday because of how much I've done it in the past and how I still do it now. Again, I ask that you pray for me as I begin battling against this notion that God isn't like that. I know in my heart of hearts he's not like that but of course (me and my logical self) because of all that I've experienced and seen in my life of people doing that, I can't help but translate as God being that way as well.

Well thanks for checking in on me! Hope y'all have a great and safe Memorial Day. I also want to say as special thank you to all the service men and women out there protecting all of us here and abroad who can't defend themselves. I also wish to thank and extended my deepest condolences to the families out there who have lost loved one due to them serving to fight for those of us who couldn't fight for ourselves. No word or deed could ever be done to replace that precious person you lost... thank you for having helped make that person who they were that they would pay the ultimate sacrifice for you and me.



Later days!

~Jeanne:)

Hey guys! Sorry for not posting in such a long time... so busy with life, school and everything else in between happening! Hope all is going well for everyone... lets get to it, shall we?

So school is over for some people... however I'm one of those lucky few that in order to play catch up I choose to do summer school (can you hear the sarcasm in my words?) ;) Really in all honesty, I'm excited! I'm happy I get to catch up on my classes and learn some more this summer. Also during this time, I've been hired on as one of the female summer RAs here at the school so that will be fun, right? Anywho, I'll be taking some American Literature, God and Redemption, Power Encounter and Western Civilization II this summer! I can't wait...



Well beside school stuff, I've been having a little fun too! I've hung out with friends, attended nice, fancy like banquets and even helped my youth pastor boyfriend Rich out with his youth group. Its so much fun to hang out with those kids and help Rich it... I love doing it and getting to know each one of them more and more! :D Here's a few pics from the last couple of things I've had the absolute pleasure and delight of helping out with...







Again, its been such a blast to get to know these kids and their folks and being a part of this ministry!



Now when it comes to my spiritual walk... that's a little more difficult to pin point. Its just that I feel a little distant from God. In all honesty, I haven't been consistent with my quiet times and searching for God. I've been so loaded down with school and with different stuff when it comes to friends, drama, family, etc. What I do know is that I can't keep doing this... I feel like I'm in a haze and all I'm doing is walking forward, just daily doing the right thing when its required (and at times when its not) and just moving on. Each day I try and walk in God's obedience and sometimes that's alot more easier said than done. With summer school coming up next week and other responsibilities falling on me, I truly hope that I make that time for him. I truly do want and desire to change from the person I was and even am now and become that new creation he wants and wishes me to be. But I know its gonna take alot more sacrifice on my part... I've just gotta do it...

Well that's it for now! Sorry its not more, hopefully I'll be able to tell you alot more the next time I post! Hope all is well! Later days!

~Jeanne;)

Hey there guys! Its been such a long while... but between school, family, social life and the like I've hardly had much of a break! However now that I have a slight breather I can let y'all know what's going on in my life right now...

First and foremost, school is ramping up like it never has before! I mean I knew that assignments and papers and the like were going to be coming up and the expectations of papers in my new major (Family and Children's Ministry) were going to start getting a bit tough but dang! I REALLY wasn't expecting this... However I know God has led me in this direction for whatever reason and so I'm gritting my teeth and pushing through, giving my all and hoping I survive in the end... @.@; Also, I had to have my adviser interview for the department to get to know me and look over my application of being accepted into the department. Please pray that all goes well with that. Also, I'm trying my hardest to get into summer school and play "catch up" this summer with some of my courses. Pray that all goes well with that (especially financially).



Well when it comes to family and friends and significant others, all is going pretty well. Rich and I are still dating (it'll be almost 4 or 5 months now) and are enjoying it tremendously! We've learned ALOT about ourselves and about God in all this! Such a blessing to be in each others' lives the way we are especially when it comes to helping one another out whatever that may be (like how he helps me out with school and understanding ministry or how I help him with his youth ministry from time to time and continue encouraging him however he may need it). My family is still working hard and doing well... my dad is still looking for a job and working on his Master of Divinity degree while my mom is still working as a first grade teacher and she just got done with her masters degree and received her diploma the other day! I can't wait to go to her graduation ceremony... So proud of her... :D My sister is still singing and writing music as always and working hard! Like I said, all is going pretty well... :)



Now when it comes to God and my walk with him right now, let's just say its focusing ALOT on trust. After pursuing God in this sense for so long, now it feels like God is asking me and encouraging me to trust him and others in far deeper levels than I ever had before and I'm not going to lie: it terrifies the ever living snot out of me! I know this may sound weird and even contradictory to how I usually sound but bear with me. Most of my life, anything and everything good I've strive after (whether that was dreams, guys, careers, etc) was either denied to me or it was given to me for a short time and then taken from me ...- either way, some serious wounds came about as a result making it hard to trust God and others and causing me to result to investing very little in personal relationships with others cause, "Hey! What does it matter? I won't be here long anyway...". In a sense you could say, my biggest insecurity is that God denies me some of the great things in life for whatever reason He seems fit. Now I know in my heart of hearts that God is a faithful and loving God and that he grants us the desires of our hearts in one way or another. However, me being a very logical and analytical person, I can't help but deduce God being like this because of the experiences I have had in my life.
During this time, I'm also going through Beth Moore's "So Long Insecurity" book (via podcasts) and that has definitely been doing a number on me. Not only am I addressing my own self made insecurities but insecurities I've developed due to others or even some of the things God has taken me through and that I've taken away from those experiences. Right now I just ask y'all to pray for me in all of this... I know that once I start really battling this and conquering it so many things are going to start opening for me when it comes to life and understanding and walking with God.

Well that's it for now... I hope this wasn't too much or even too little for you! Take care and hope to hear/see y'all soon! Later days!

~Jeanne;)

Hey there gang! Its been quite busy.. sorry for the delay in blog posts but here we go! :)

So naturally as it happens in school, things are starting to pick up in classes and their assignments. I have quite a few projects and papers coming up and I've been trying to stay ahead of the game. Things are looking good but now I have other things to add on to that though: finding a car, finding a job, lining up stuff for the summer so I can stay up here in Toccoa to do summer school and all, tax stuff, etc. Yeah, if it isn't one thing then its another right now. I'm also trying not to get frustrated but that's easier said than done. >.<* Just praying for patience and stead-fastness in all of this so I can get it done and done well! :)



Yeah so Valentine's Day is coming up. Not gonna lie... I'm kinda excited! ^.^ Rich and I are planning to do something (what exactly I'm not too sure but he does) and not to put pressure on him but this will be my very first Valentine's Day with someone... ever! Valentine's Day was, to me at least, like another Easter or Christmas where it was about getting candy than anything else (while telling others in your life -parents, siblings, friends, etc- that they're special). But as time went on, it became more of that "Singles Awareness' Day" for me. Now however, I'm really excited that not only do I get to be part of the festivities like other couples do but more so I get to spend it with someone who's not only my best friend but someone I care so deeply for and treasure so much so in my life! Its so wonderful... :D



So keeping with the "love" theme, I want to let you guys know that I've found this book that I've heard alot of people recommend to me but was kinda hesitant to read: "When God Writes Your Love Story" by Eric and Leslie Ludy. Not gonna lie-sounds like a great book but I'm a little scared in reading it. Not too sure what is going to be said in it but I know that as soon as I read the intro into the book and the very last sentence really gets to you, maybe it would be a good thing to read it: Will you let Me (God) write your love story? The true Author of love and relationships wants to create and design a unique and powerful love story that not only transcends the best love stories the world has to offer but that in the end centers and glorifies him. I'm scared... but I can't help but wonder what exactly it would entail. All I know is that I have this feeling that this book could wreck me... and it might just be that I need that... :)

Well that's it for now! Sorry it wasn't too long or extensive like it usually is. Hope y'all are having a great week and hope to see ya soon! Later days!

~Jeanne;)

Hey guys how's it going? Hope all is well.. things are going pretty well for me right now. But lets cut the formalities and get to what you are really here for... ;)

So yeah! I started my second semester here at Toccoa Falls this past week! It was pretty stressful at first because I signed up for three CE (Christian Education) classes - which all you do is write MASSIVE papers in- and then a couple of required classes as well as signed up for a student ministry! However, when I looked at the syllabi for all my classes and the requirements for student ministry... I literally curled up in a ball and cried I was so stressed out! So I (begrudgingly) dropped one of my CE classes to lighten the loads so I actually gained my weekends and free time back! :D In all honesty, it was some of that but more so if I'm going to learning and studying this stuff in which is going to more than likely require me to later apply and use in life for the vocation I've been called to, I need to FULLY understand and retain as much of this stuff as possible. Cause hey, these are just any lives I'm going to working with and help to lead to the Lord but children's lives and souls - heavy responsibilities my friends... :S



So with the classes I'm taking now, I'm slowly being introduced and understanding some of the things that are being asked and called for from people who are going into ministries and not just children and youth ministries but more so FAMILY ministry! If there is anything that I've figured I have a passion for its for the concept and vision of what family is and really what God intended it to be. My passion has become this and the importance of syncing the various ministries of the church so that it may better serve the family and putting the responsibility of educating the children and yourself in a better understanding of God and his will for everyone's life! As I've begun finding and establishing a desire and goal for the kind of ministry I wish to one day construct and do in a church, I'm learning more and more the importance of a child's soul and how when a child is well established in a Christian worldview they are more likely to continue their relationship with Christ and be far more effective Christians in this world than the generation before them was. I can't wait to see what I learn and what desire and passion comes next... :D



So right now with school getting under way and yet to find a good book to read for my devotional time, I'm walking through and reading the Gospel of John. "Truly, truly I say unto you" that his guy loved Jesus (probably why he was called the Beloved Disciple). I'm up to chapter 20 now where Jesus has just been crucified and taken down and buried. But today one of the chapters I read was about when he was before Pontus Pilate being tried and the Jews wanting Rome to crucify him. First of they said they brought him to the Praetorium (generally the place where the governor of that area lives and works), very early in the morning! Meaning these dudes drag Jesus to the Governor's house possibly before or even when the sun is rising and starting banging on Pontus Pilate's door to get him to come out and judge Jesus (no they couldn't go in because then they wouldn't be able to partake in Passover). Really... if you were Pontus Pilate and some dudes (who probably really don't like nor care for much) come banging on your door before the butt-crack of dawn wanting you to trial a man who you know nothing about? Or maybe he did... after all this happening, Jesus is summoned inside and the first question out of Pontus Pilate's mouth is "Are you the king of the Jews?" Maybe he had seen and/or heard about Jesus and probably already knew the stigma this guy had amongst some Jews. Of course Jesus asks him if he was saying this willingly or if someone told Pilate about him. Of course Pilate tells him he knows nothing and begins asking him again whether or not he was a king. Jesus tells him he has answered correctly and tells him, "For this I have been born, and for this I have come into the world, to testify to the truth. Everyone who is of the truth hears My voice.” Then Pilate states one of the oldest philosophical questions ever: "What is truth?" After that all it says is that he had him flogged, found no guilt in him and was about to turn him over to the Jews who were about to have him killed when he found out another fact about this man: He claimed to be the Son of God. Pilate immediately returns to Jesus and asks him where he was from. No reply. Then he said something that probably struck a nerve with Jesus: "Do you know I have the authority to save your life?" In that one sentence, whether knowingly or not, he literally spat not only in the face of God and his authority over all things but he also spat on the greatest mission God had ever concocted: the plan of salvation for all of his creation. I can almost see Jesus responding, not just fatigued by the beatings but also in pure anger and frustration, “You would have no authority over Me, unless it had been given you from above; for this reason he who delivered Me to you has the greater sin.” Of course afterward it talks about how Pilate tries to save Jesus' life but to no avail. In the end, the question was asked of the Jews "Shall I crucify your king?" I can't help but look at this and see it as a last chance for them to try and see what God was doing and actually letting God be their King! However in one quick and devastating proclamation, the Jews turned their backs completely on God: "We have no king but Caesar." Makes a person really think doesn't it...

Well that's it for now! Hope y'all have a great rest of the week! Hope to see some of y'all soon! Later days!

~Jeanne;)

Hey guys! Hope y'all are having a great week! Hopefully y'all are doing well with New Year's Resolutions, avoiding sickness and getting back into "normal mode" now that the holidays are over with. I know I am...

Now, some of y'all have already headed back to school and are beginning to feel the pressure of the academic world upon you (like I am). Some of y'all still have some time before heading back and are enjoying their time off and even more of y'all are done with school (not going to lie I envy y'all latter two). I had to come back and take a required class for my degree (Western Thought and Culture or Humanities as some call it). Its been pretty interesting because of some of the history aspect to it. However - not going to lie - its almost pointless to take because of how condensed they have made it. I, more than likely, will not remember much of this after I'm done because of quickly we went through it and how very little time was spent on some of the material. The cool thing, I think, about all this is that the class I'm in is taught by the philosophy professor here at TFC so of course he puts alot of the philosophical spin on it, when he can. So I am somewhat enjoying it... somewhat... ;)



Well as I talked about last time, I was going to try and dig deeper and establish a better understanding and practice of spiritual discipline and in all honesty guys I had no idea what I was getting myself into. For the past week I have tried and tried to read and develop some kind of discipline in my prayer life and in my quiet times and you would have thought I had given an open invitation to the Enemy to come at me! I can't believe how much the Enemy has used things (and succeeded in using them) to keep me from establishing some kind of discipline in my spiritual walk. The distractions, the worries, the lies, the temptations... its crazy! The thing is as much as I want to give up, I can't... I know it would be easier to just roll over and take the hits from the Enemy however I can't. As I sit here and think about it, the same question keeps popping up: Why? Why is he doing this to me? I know that the Enemy doesn't want me to get closer to my heavenly father and he wants to see me fail and fail miserably (as CS Lewis once said -loosely quoting - that its not the nonbelievers that the Enemy has to work to have them in hell, but its the believers who fall away from God that are the greatest victories for him). The thing is that that can't be the only reason. I feel like there is something else... like there is something that the Enemy is afraid of me learning, establishing and becoming and he is doing everything he can to keep from that goal. And because of that, it only makes me more determined to do this now... pray for me as I do this... :)



So I know that this is a rarity but I want to ask you guys to pray for me and for some of the people in my life:
-Me: God's strength and courage to face the enemy and truly begin to develop discipline in my life. (A little less minor one-I'm still looking for a car. Prayers for that would be appreciated as well)
-My boyfriend: he's been pretty sick. Pray for God's healing hand on him.
-My family
-My friends here at TFC: A lot of people are either sick or are dealing with some serious financial issues which is keeping them from coming back for school. Pray that God's will be done in all of these things.

I also want y'all to know that if you ever need someone to pray for you about something, I'm always here. Let me know if y'all need prayer for something, whatever it may be! I love you guys and I want to be able to help you however I can and I know the least I can do for y'all is pray.

Well that's it for now! Gotta get back to studying and preparing for the week! Y'all take it easy... later days!

~Jeanne;)

Hey y'all! Hope all is going well! Sorry its been so long but of course you come home and after not seeing your family for a long time and not hanging out with them, your schedule tends to fill up quick! But now that I have some down time, I can let y'all know what's going on...

So yeah I came home and pretty much just crashed for a couple of days and not really wanting to do anything but read, play on Facebook and watch some episodes of "How I Met Your Mother". In between all that, my schedule filled up quick: little siblings wanted me to hang out with them, mom and older sister wanted me to go out with them and dad wanted me to watch movies with him (usually with me rubbing his back while we were watching them). Then friends and extended family wanted to see me so of course I went out and enjoyed some awesome food and socializing time! Now I'm getting to the point where I'm just beat and I just want time to myself again so I can go curl up in a place somewhere and just relax and read some. Of course, that's easier said than done... :S Oh well, now that Christmas is over, I can actually wind down some and slowly get ready to return to TFC...



Yep, I actually have only a few days left before I head back to school and start into my Winterim class, Western Thought and Culture. I can't wait to get back up to TFC and see all my friends and back to routine! Yes, I said it! I like routine, school and the like.... Its usually when I have to go on breaks and vacations and stuff that I kinda don't know what to do. :S I know, its weird but that's just the kind of girl I am. Anywho, I'm really excited about starting into the new program and really seeing where God is leading me in all of this! :D



So when it comes to my quiet times and what God is showing me and talking to me about is discipline. Yep... I'm getting back to the basics of my spiritual disciplines and practices with God. Right now I'm reading a couple of books: "My Utmost For His Highest" by Oswald Chambers (I'm still using this during my quiet times) and "Celebration of Discipline" by Richard J. Foster. I'm also hoping to read a book my boyfriend, Rich got me as a somewhat early Christmas present, "The Cost of Discipleship" by Dietrich Bonhoeffer (I've never read anything of his but I've always wanted to so I'm uber excited). The thing is for the past several weeks (over a month really) God has been gently bring this to my attention as something I really need to look into and get a better understanding and practice of. I see know that if I really want to do and be a part of the things that God is leading me towards (ministry, relationships, serving others, etc.) I need to really start developing a stronger relationship with him and begin seriously disciplining myself in my times with him and not just inwardly but also in outward and corporate spiritual disciplines (as Mr. Foster would call them). As I write this I can't help but think of the Shane and Shane song, "May the Words of My Mouth". Its worth a listen...



After listening to this song, I know that in my heart of hearts that I have this desire and I truly wish for this but I know that I don't have what it takes right now and it will only be when I developed the different disciplines that I will get there. Here's hoping for the best...

Well that's it for now! Hope all of y'all had a grand Christmas and I hope for a safe and happy New Year for y'all! Later days!

~Jeanne;)

Hey there gang! Its been quite a while... sorry about that but that just means there's more stuff to tell... ;)

Well lets start with this week: Finals Week! Yep... studying; cramming knowledge, coffee and junk food (usually in that order), freaking out and praying that God not only would pull multiple epiphanies as you take your tests but that He would soften the hearts (and minds) of your professors so that you could get the best grade possible... yep, in the very middle of that right now. >.< I've already got one test out of the way and will be studying for tomorrow's two tests today. Right now, I'm just taking it one day at a time, not getting too overwhelmed and hoping that I don't die of a heart attack or anxiety attack... :)



So as soon as Finals are over, I will be heading home and I really can't wait to see my family and hang out with them! Although Christmas will be a bit rough for us, I'm just glad we can be together and be able to unwind and enjoy each others' company and not have to worry about work, school or anything else. Christmas has always been a very big and special time for all of us in my house; many of me and my family's fondest memories usually took place around Christmas. So of course when the time comes, we love sitting around in the den, looking over old photo albums or watching old family home videos and reminisce about the "good ol' days". For me, these times are also times to reflect and see where God has brought me and my family through and I can't help but feel loved, blessed and that's its been quite an adventure thus far. Also, these times have become more and more sparse as I've gotten older and had to start finding my place in this world so of course they've become more and more precious to me. But I also can't wait to see and experience the future ones to come... :)



Well many of y'all who are friends with me on Facebook have already heard the news but for those of you who haven't heard or don't know... I'm in a relationship now! XD I'm dating my best friend, Rich who I've known for quite a while now and was one of the people who told me about and encouraged me to come to Toccoa Falls College (he's an alumni from the school so who better to tell me about the school?). We have been talking for quite a while now about a relationship and we made it official this past weekend. Of course we have had a TON of people praying and encouraging us in this direction so when it happened it was very exciting for everyone! :D I really can't thank God enough for blessing me by putting such an incredible, Godly man in my life and how I've been blessed with his friendship and support as much as he has! In all honesty, I am a bit scared but I also know that all right now all I can do is to continue putting God and his will first and putting into practice more and more the things that he has been teaching all these months about love, supporting others and continuing in daily obedience in God. If you really want more details about how it happened, just get in touch with me... ;)



So I guess the next question in my head right now with finals, Christmas time and a new relationship now here is: What's coming, God? What is on the horizon for me? I know for sure that school will be different for me because of the new major in Family and Children's Ministry I have; life will be different now that I have a boyfriend and I'm beginning to find myself apart from my family so... what now? Only God knows... and you know what, maybe that how it needs to be. Think about it: if we did know about every little thing that comes our way what will make life fun, adventurous and memorable? As much as I want to know the future, I can't help but feel a small part of me doesn't really want to know. Not because I'm afraid of all the horrible and sad things that will come but more so because it ruins the unexpectedness. As a person who is very organized and punctual and all, you would think I wouldn't be like that all and really I wasn't. But now I've learned that those kinds of situations, things and experiences are usually when God shows up the most and you are able to learn something about yourself, about him and about others. So I keep looking to the horizon, but I don't look too far ahead; I'm trying to keep in perspective the people and the situations around me in the here and now as well so that I may learn and so that I may be able to teach others... :)

Well that's it for now! Hope y'all have a great rest of the week (especially those of my friends who are taking Finals), take care and later days!

~Jeanne;)